It's just a couple of hours before we celebrate the New Year here in Sydney. I understand that it is also the start of a new solar month, a 19 year event. Pundits say it is a good omen for a fantastic year in the offing. Well, forgive me for being sceptical, but this time last year I could hardly wait for the clock to strike midnight and get rid of that 'awful 2012', which began with me having to undergo radiation treatment for a 'precancerous spot' on my 'other breast'. So, I am being very circumspect with the coming of 2014.
Just to recap. I was first diagnosed with stage 2-3 breast cancer in the right breast in 2006. After a lumpectomy, followed by standard chemo and radiation treatment, I was put on Tamoxifen for 5 years.
On my fifth annual visit to the surgeon in November 2011, a small precancerous area was detected in my left breast. Because of the type of pre-cancer it turned out to be, I had to have lumpectomy and radiation treatment.
Apart from the fact that I was pretty drastically fried (for which my lovely radiation oncologist apologised), things were looking up around May, and I went back to my temping job. I also embarked on a year-long screenwriting class with the view to finishing the first draft of a screenplay I'd been working on for about three years.
Not to get ahead of my story, but by this time last year I was not feeling well at all. I was eating less and less and was 'gaining weight'. I could work right up to the end of the season, but got pretty lax on writing the screenplay. I didn't realise why I was feeling more and more sluggish and tired, so I welcomed 2013 with open arms and great hopes for my health, my writing and my ability to earn a living. How wrong I was!
2013 has been one of those awful years that probably come round in everyone's life at least once. The type of year that changes the direction of your life - for the worse. In this blog I've been recording some of the details of how I deal with breast cancer, and how I try to stay positive during treatment and the accompanying uncertainties. I've told you how I felt when two of my new 'mates' died. But life goes on and one has to deal with issues other than 'the cancer' as well.
One of the bright spots on the horizon for me in August was my brother's plan to celebrate his 80th birthday in December by taking the whole family, including his own and his wife's children, grandchildren, me and my son and his family, on a 7-day Caribbean cruise (they all live in the Miami, Florida Keys area). I asked the Professor if I could stop treatment in September, but he said no, we shall have to see in October, so I cancelled my trip, because I knew I couldn't possibly travel 10,000 miles a few days after chemo treatment.
In the meantime, my brother had to have a heart valve replacement operation, so I wasn't sure he would make it either. He was adamant that he would go, 'even if they have to carry me' - he told me. Well, they carried him into emergency two days before the cruise. None of us realised (including the doctors, I believe) how serious his condition was, so the kids went. His condition deteriorated rapidly after they returned. He died on 10th of December, five days shy of his 80th birthday. May he rest in peace and his memory be for a blessing.
So, you see the reason I am not sure how to greet 2014. My friends say it couldn't be worse, but......
Stay tuned.....
I'll probably be a bubbling optimist again by tomorrow.
